Food For Thought...

I am making dinner, and using my trusty Mac book as my BFF and step by step information giver via the pioneer woman... I also happen to have the news on in the background. I just overheard that President Barry has only spoken with the General in charge of the Afghanistan war once since taking office. He has traveled to LA to sit with Jay on the Tonight Show. Last week he was on Letterman. So, let me get this straight... our Commander in Chief thinks that guest appearances with late night comedians is far more pressing of an issue than speaking with those who are in charge of a war we are currently involved in??? Did someone switch my Adderall RX for crazy pills at Olson Brothers Pharmacy??? Sounds like someone in the administration has their priorities mixed up. Seriously?!?!? Is this a joke?!?!?!

Back to my Chicken... which could prove to be more of a disaster than the Afghan war. At least there is always salad and pudding pops... one could survive for months on salad and pudding pops... I know... I have done this many times in my life. Well, throw in hot tamales and skittles and you pretty much have my 4 food groups covered.

From Russia With Love.

In today's Minneapolis Star Tribune sports section, an article was written about the Wayzata football quarterback. It is a story of ordinary miracles, family, and triumph. Read the article here

However, there is another story that was not written. One about a different Sasha. A Sasha who was also born in far away Russia to a woman I do not know... but I do love her. She has given me the greatest gift this world has blessed me with thus far. She gave me a little brother. Someone to watch over. Someone to hang out with and pontificate the meaning of life sixteen year old style. This gift, my brother, is now thriving in the midst of 10th grade at Edina High School. Today, he does not go by the name, "Sasha". He is Alex, or more affectionately, Bugly, little man, punk, brother, son.

Alex was all conference for the Edina High School alpine ski team this past year as a freshman. He spends nearly every moment in the cold winter months at Highland Hills, braving the cold with a smile not only on his face, but in his heart. Skiing is his passion, and he truly excels at it. It is his master craft. After all, how many freshman achieve all conference status. While we, his family, think of him as the next Bode... but better, it is not his skiing talent that makes this kid special. It is his heart.

Alex is the single kindest person I have ever met. He has been blessed with a sweet soul. I have yet to see him in a bad mood. Seriously. If there was somebody I wish to be more like, it is him. He is a living example to all who meet him on how to be a little kinder, a hard worker, and a little more honest. This kid is a star on and off the ski slope, the MSHSL alpine books document his achievements between the gates. Unfortunately, they do not keep records of his contribution to his family, friends, and community. He is a quiet leader. He leads not through inspiring speeches and grand gestures, but through example. He has signed up to be a small group leader at his church for middle school kids. He is selfless in every moment of his life. He is simply one in a million. I am fortunate to be able to call him brother.

The love and pride that I have for him is infinite. He has taught me more about compassion and love than any single other person ever has and probably ever will. I do not know who I would be today without his presence. He is that profound. Even at sixteen years young, this kid touches lives... and not just those in his immediate family. He has served as Jr. best man in a close friend's wedding. I watched from the groom's side with pride while he stood up for "our" friend. He believes in fair play even if it puts him at the disadvantage. He is a wonderful kid. There simply is no me without him. Actually, there would be no "family" without him. He made our blended family a family. No more his and hers... just a family. He is a gift. What we did to deserve him, I simply cannot comprehend. I stand in awe of my brother.

I am eternally grateful that a little boy born in Tomsk, Russia found a place to officially call home in Edina, Minnesota. I sit here and write this, and cannot help but to think about his birth parents. I know that if they met him today, they too would be proud. He is our own family miracle. He makes his entire family better human beings. He walks in love and friendship. He is my hero.

Alex,
I wish that I had 10 brothers just like you. You are the single most important soul I know. You have taught me that family is not about DNA... it is about love. You have shown me how to be a kinder, gentler, more loving, patient person. You have reminded me about the fun of being in high school. Enjoy your time Bug, it goes pretty fast. It is with great pride that I call you my favorite brother. (alright, so you are my only brother...details) You are amazing. I love you. You are now and always will be MY athlete of the week. Love you, little man.
Love from your favorite sister,
Future Queen of the House

"We witness a miracle every time a child enters into life. But those who make their journey home across time and miles, growing withing the hearts of those who wait to love them, are carried on the wings of destiny, and place among us by God's own hands."

Kanye Is A Jerk Part Deux.

Dear Taylor,
I don't own your CD... I got tired of Tim McGraw. You are not on my IPod playlist... I don't even know where it is at the moment. But that is another story entirely. However, apparently you beat out Mrs. Jay-Z last night for some sort of award in some sort of category for a great music video. I will go to youtube or CMT.com and check it out. I promise. I am sorry that Mr. West feels that not only does George Bush hate all black people, but he also feels that Beyonce made the greatest music video since Thriller and yours was just good. To be quite honest, I have not seen Beyonce's video, either. I don't know if it is "all that and a bag of chips" or not. This is what happens when you have to get a real job... you miss out on TRL (is that still on... man do I feel old...and I miss that hour of the day whiling away doing nothing awesome... which was awesome.) Anyways, I am sure that your super fab IPhone has been ringing off the hook today not only to congratulate you... but also to vent their disdain for Mr. West's unforgivable actions. Let me file neatly into the single file line, and do the same. He is a jerk. And, surprisingly, Beyonce was a class act. You should add her to your myspace top 8 today if you already didn't. Who knows? Maybe the two of you could go shopping at Kitson later this week and buy something I wish that I owned to bond over the embarrassing fiasco. I guess that the awards scene isn't really a place Mr. West belongs. At least he didn't call you a racist. At least you have the trophy. I bet Beyonce wishes that it was gracing her mantle and not yours tonight. Go ahead and snap a series of you holding your award and send it out to all your semi fabulous Hollywood friends and foes. You deserve it!
Kindest Regards,
Future Queen of the House.

Ski U Mah!

The best saturday I have had in a long long time. I am sick that my camera battery didn't charge... and thus I have no pictures... however, the memories from Sept. 12, 2009 will last a lifetime. Happy Birthday little man. Hope that your day was awesome. I cant think of a better way to celebrate than with a gopher win, a new stadium... a Minnesota Band T-shirt... and your 2 favorite sisters. Seriously, this has been the weekend ever. Bunny's on Friday, Gopher Mania Saturday, and a lazy sunday finished off with a couple of bootleggers at Interlachen. Perfect weather, good people, great times. Can't wait till next week... Come on Gophs... I know we can beat Cal.

9/11

Many Americans have forgotten exactly how this horrific day felt. We have once again settled into a state of complacency and ignorance. We have once again begun to take our liberty for granted. Remember the thousands whose lives were lost. Remember that these people were participating in the miracle of capitalism. They bought a plane ticket... they went to work... everything ran like clock work... because if it didn't, they would fail.

They hailed a taxi cab... which somebody drove... who reported to a shift manager... who reported to the owner of the taxi company, who probably thought that owning a taxi company would make a pretty good living for his family. They arrived on time to the airport, because if they didn't nobody would wait for them to catch up; they would simply miss the boat. They had to be responsible. They had to carry their own suitcases and destiny. They arrived at their desks on time, if they didn't they would be reprimanded and possibly let go. Somebody would surely fill their shoes. They printed off documents at their desks... they refilled the printer... all available because somebody started a paper mill... all because somebody started a lumber yard. They bought a breakfast sandwich on the go because they were hungry... because somebody thought that there was a need for a quick meal... and that somebody made it available. The circle continues...

Stop for a second and think about it... capitalism truly is a miracle... right down to the minute details of fast food and taxi cab rides and phone calls. Our very daily existence simply could not exist without the genius of capitalism. Could the government provide all of these things in the same timely manner with the same returns? Obviously, I am suspect. Admittedly, I am a capitalist.

Then, suddenly, our nation was under attack. The innocent made last phone calls to loved ones. They threw themselves out of towering infernos...taking their fate into their own hands one last time. Things drastically changed. We changed.

Did they change for the better? For a while, I believe that they did. But like all things, memories become faded and jaded. It became politics as usual. Change arrived in Washington. Change that our nation supposedly needed. They nation forgot how it felt that September morning. Instead of embracing the "change" of 9/11, we the people have collectively run from it. Once again, it is 9/11... and I do believe that our nation is under a different sort of attack.

The miracle of capitalism is under attack. I ask that you do not go quietly into the dark, but instead, stand up for our nation. After all, that is the American way. Instead of running out of burning skyscrapers, we run into them. Our brothers and sisters who died on this day who supported, celebrated, and lived the American dream, albeit probably without giving it much thought at the time, they were doing their job. They deserve to have their memories and their nation that they did indeed die for... and not on their own accord preserved for the true miracle it is. This nation was and is a miracle.

Let us remember those who so innocently perished 8 years ago today. Lets not fight not only for them, but for ourselves. Let us be courageous once again. Let us take control of our own destiny. My destiny is not controlled now or ever will be dictated by a bureaucrat in Washington. Do not let yours be shaped by them, either. Instead, I implore you to find your own way. Become a success yourselves. Take pride in what you do. Be accountable. This will be their legacy. The most inspirational and lasting tribute.

Send a message to those who choose to hate us for our ingenuity and prosperity. Do not fall victim to their maliciousness. Become even more inventive, set your bar higher. Prosper like you never dreamed... dream bigger, higher, faster, more often. See their hands, and raise them. Let us show them and the rest of the world that we are not Europeans, we are not Africans, we are not Australians, we are Americans. We dissociated with their ideologies 233 years ago... we must hold fast to the founding principles that have made us great. Why abandon them now? When we do this, we honor those who died, but also those who lived to see 9/12.

People say that miracles happen every day... I just bought a vitamin water and milk bones at the gas station, and could not be more thankful for or in awe of the miracle of capitalism.

This post was brought to you by the letters U, S, and A.

A Forwarded Email Future House Queen Style.

I received this email as a forward today... well, most of it... I updated it to be more me.

o I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” and road construction routing option.

o More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.

o Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you could be wrong. Still, never admit defeat.

o I don’t understand the purpose of the line, “I don’t need to drink to have fun.” Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they’ve invented the lighter?

o Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you’re going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you’re crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

o I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to pee my pants when I was younger.

o The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will always be ending a work email with the phrase “Regards”... its like playing roulette... who knows where your pointer finger will land.

o Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn’t work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ’s. We just figured it out. Today’s kids are soft... and DVD's are superior to cartridges.

o There is a great need for sarcasm font. and an angry font... and a i am just in a hurry font.

o Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw it.

o I think everyone has a movie that they love so much; it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I’ll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone’s laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I’m still the only one who really, really gets it.

o How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

o I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

o I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

o The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text or locate something in my oversized handbag.

o A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

o Was learning cursive really necessary?

o Lol has gone from meaning, “laugh out loud” to “I have nothing else to say”.

o I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and beginning happy hour.

o Whenever someone says “I’m not book smart, but I’m street smart”, all I hear is “I’m not real smart, but I’m imaginary smart”.

o How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear what they said?

o While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it…thanks Mario Kart.

o MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

o Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

o I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

o Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever... unless you just peed them.

o I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of spunky.

o Bad decisions make good stories.

o Whenever I’m Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don’t mind if I do!

o If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

o Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I’m from; this shouldn’t be a problem…

o You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you’ve made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day... or week.

o Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don’t want to have to restart my collection.

o There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far... or have a near miss on the interstate.

o I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my sixty page employee manual that I swear I did not make any changes to.

o “Do not machine wash or tumble dry” means I will chance it... and likely ruin said garment.

o I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There’s so much pressure. ‘I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It’s only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?’

o I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What’d you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away?

o I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. I also hate leaving my house in sweats and a FLDS braid in my hair sans lip gloss and a chipped pedicure and running into everyone that I have not seen in 7-9 years.

o When I meet someone, I’m terrified of mentioning something she hasn’t already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

o I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it’s on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

o Why is a school zone 15 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles…

o As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

o Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

o I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

o I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

o Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn’t know what do to with it.

o Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet my a$$ everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time…

o I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

o I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

o I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

Liar Liar... Pelosi Sets Wilson's Pants On Fire With Her Blazing Hot Glare Of Disdain.

Rep. Wilson called PBO a liar. Nancy Pelosi and VP Joe the dunce have just removed their rose colored glasses and put on their "angry eyes". Things just got interesting. Things are looking up... This could prove to be fun. Wait a minute, this is not a laughing matter. This is serious business. There is nothing funny about the government trying to impose a disaster of a health care policy on we the people. I mean nothing.

Wait a minute... things just got funny again. Barry (AKA "Golden Boy") just said that this could all be paid for by shaking up medicare and medicaid and ridding it of the corruption... and using those funds to pay for his initiative. I just peed my sweat pants. Who does he think he is speaking to... the first graders he addressed yesterday? I don't believe that there is a single American who believes that this is a viable solution. Nice try though, Mr. President.

However, things are not funny. (But they sort of are) You cannot compare the cost of defending our national security against tablecloth wearing wack jobs to a "voluntary" government expansion. There is no comparison. If we do nothing to thwart those crazy guys probably named Mohammad or Abdi we the people will live in a very different and scary world. If we do nothing to reform health care, we the people still are afforded the ability to choose our doctors and whether or not to subscribe to health care plans.

Though he may dismiss the town hall attendees as "out of touch" with what our country so desperately needs, I dare say that he should probably take a long hard look into that hall of mirrors at 1600 Pennsylvania. After all it is you, Mr. President that needs to spend a little more time looking in the mirro; these are your constituents. I am fairly certain that they, unlike yourself do not willingly associate with ones who view everyday hard working Americans as white polluters. Unlucky for us the likes of these seem to be in your "top 8" on myspace. Me... I have Goldy the Gopher... so what do I really know?

Mr. Jones Said...

A bit of insight into our commander in chief's closest "green" pal and his views. The video is a little long, but worth watching. My parents always said that they didn't have to worry about me as long as the company I kept was "good company". I judge PBO by his actions, his friends, and his affection for the White Sox. (seriously, who likes the sox) These judgements are not viewed in a favorable light. He is toxic to America. The worst ever. And, his friends, my friends, deplorable.

BTW... God Bless the USA for affording me the free speech to say such things about our leader. I wonder if he had his way if this would continue... or would he simply choose to address the nation CCCP style (like he plans to do with our school kids next week) to remind us how wonderful he is. I have a deep respect for the office of the presidency, but unfortunately, I do not hold the same affections to PBO. 39 months and counting... 39 months and counting. I hope and pray that "change" is a comin' our way.