Trumped.

I have been trumped. No, not punked... trumped.

My mama is brilliant... genius.

She is going back to Washington.

She has been asked to testify before congress.

Obviously I am very proud of her.

She is, after all, my hero... or one of them.

I am also quite nervous.

She hates the C&C.

She thinks he is a cheeky little pr*ck.

I am quite confident that she will demand a copy of his birth certificate.

I am quite sure that she will make headline news when she does this.

You see, she is brilliant... but she is also painfully blunt.

She wont mince words.

She will straight out be Dr. Vicki.

She should. She is awesome.

However, the shrapnel leftover from her 5 minutes in infamy could be...

well, interesting.

Bottom line, she beat me to Washington.

She will give them hell.

She is Ms. Vicki.

Nobody ever tells her no... ever.

Somehow, I think she will walk away convincing the masses in her own way...

The best way I can think of... the Vicki way: Brutal honesty, no love for Ms. Pelosi and crew...

Good Luck Washingtonians!

You are going to need it!

She may look like Mary Poppins and your dear sweet granny...

But this lady... is tough as nails...

She will rip your argument apart faster than I can say flu shot.

Do not underestimate her.

She is a more than capable of taking on the entire house chamber...

With the aid of her super hero burberry satchel.

If I were you...

I would surrender before she checks into the Four Seasons in Georgetown.

Ladies and Gentleman... She is that good.

She is after all, my Mama!

I come from good stock!

Annoyed. Officially.

I am annoyed.

I probably woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

I hate it wehn it rains.

I hate it when it rains and my pants get all wet at the bottom.

I hate wearing wet pants.

I hate the current selection in the candy jar.

I hate Salted Nut Rolls.

I hate Mounds.

I hate 3 Musketeers.

I miss the Twizzlers.

I miss the Sunshine.

I miss the Jolly Ranchers.

I miss the Starbursts.

Heck, I even miss the Butterfinger Crisps at this point.

I should have eaten breakfast.

This Blows.

I am annoyed.

Why is it that nobody over the age of 40 can pick out a decent candy??

Why are my pant legs soaking wet... again.

I hate today. And I don't see my attitude changing before 10a.


*** Things are looking up. I ordered some new hunter rain boots in honor of my hometown deciding to emulate Seattle weather. I also bought some hot tamales.

Rick James Is His Muse.

Makes you glad that there is such a thing as Planned Parenthood, Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo, and Lifestyle Condoms. If this was my brother, I would put myself up for adoption. If this was my kid... I would purchase the local watering hole and drown my sorrows there. This kid will inevitably end up in jail. I hope his parents don't bail him out... ever. He is mad. The little brother, my hero. Don't you wish you had thought of this when your siblings were having a total meltdown?!?! This is precisely the sort of thing that only kids miss out on. Sibling rivalry, torture, and humiliation. We are all better for it.

This kid on the other hand... I don't think there is hope for him. He was born a total IMO loser. This video, however, is nothing short of beautiful.

Afghanistan.

While the nation is seemingly at war with each other over health care reform, we have forgotten that we are in a "real" war (or 2). Today 30+ lawmakers are meeting with PBO at the White House to discuss different avenues in Afghanistan. Don't you just love it! The commanding Gen. Stanley McChrystal is incapable to draft a proper plan to win this thing... and kick some Taliban ass... here comes "congress" to save the day. Phew. I am willing to bet my inheritance on the fact that these law makers have no idea what it is like being a solider in an active war. Instead of worrying about "our guys" they worry about the rights of the bat sh*t crazy terrorists who, if given the chance would blow away you, me, and Sen. I heart tablecloths and Rep. make love not war without hesitation. Instead of worrying about our soldiers safety, they worry about how the world sees the United States, writing an almost laughable rules of engagement memo to be handed out to every soldier protecting their backsides. Do not fire unless fired upon. So, even if you have UBL himself in your cross hairs, he has to point his AK-47 at you and pull the trigger before you can take the SOB out. Sounds like a winning strategy to me.

From my vantage point, the first one to fire was UBL and the Taliban (who choose to harbor this SOB... I hate them both)... apparently we have all forgotten what happened on a clear September day. Remember, over 2,500 of our civilians were murdered Rep. Politically correct. No need to wait. They engaged us. We did not invade their pathetic excuse of a nation without reason. After all, we are Americans. We are reasonable. We don't cut peoples heads off in the name of some higher power. No, that is not us. We don't run away from our problems. We face them. We don't run out of burning buildings... we run into them.

Please do not play politics as usual. Think of our soldiers first. Put them first for once. Health care reform can wait. National security cannot. Listen to those who know what is really going on. Put your ideologies aside. Shock us. Fight for those who are fighting for you, me and our Commander in Chief.

Sophomoric Humor Humors Me.

Sometimes I truly enjoy paging ficticious characters in public places. My siblings also enjoy this little game. Sometimes the poor soul in charge of the PA system catches on. More often they don't. But bet your bottom dollar that someone else who witnesses this sort of tom foolery does indeed. And it makes them chuckle. Their impish grins and my siblings gut splitting laughter is what keeps me going. Its official, Peter pan and "Mary Kate" will never grow up!

Some of my all time favorites:

* Oliver Klozoph
* Mike Hunt (this one is quite naught & should be done only after 9pm)
* Mr. Period
* Harry Muff
* Ike Arumba
* Billy Goate
* Hugh Wacker
* Jim Nastic
* Ben Dover

**** Note****

These also make excellent names at restaurants when putting in your name. Hello, my name is Future House Queen, and I am in the 4th grade.